Difference between revisions of "PHP"
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(Created page with "PHP is the name of a sub-par programming language as well as a group containing horrible English. == Reasons why PHP is a shitty language == # Node.js is the only real d...") |
(→Reasons why PHP is a shitty language) |
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# It's old, outdated, and overused just like your mom. | # It's old, outdated, and overused just like your mom. | ||
# The syntax is long and ugly like your face. | # The syntax is long and ugly like your face. | ||
| − | + | # Shitty recursion support. | |
| + | # No namespaces. What kind of shitty ass programming language wouldn't have namespaces? | ||
| + | # Many of its own modules aren't thread safe, leading to performance worse than South Park's rendition of Lorde. | ||
| + | # If you're going to try to understand a PHP license, you might as well get your Ph.D. in hieroglyphics. | ||
| + | # Most languages choose from one of the following naming conventions: | ||
| + | ## getnumberoffiles | ||
| + | ## get_number_of_files | ||
| + | ## getNumberOfFiles | ||
| + | # PHP decided, fuck you, we'll use '''ALL THREE'''! | ||
| + | # Good luck finding an object-oriented framework other than Zend PHP Framework. | ||
| + | # No unicode support. No. Unicode. Support. | ||
| + | # PHP is as quick and easy as getting from Bronx to Queens during rush hour. | ||
== PHP: The Group == | == PHP: The Group == | ||
Revision as of 22:36, January 15, 2016
PHP is the name of a sub-par programming language as well as a group containing horrible English.
Reasons why PHP is a shitty language
- Node.js is the only real dev language. Doesn't everyone know that?
- It's old, outdated, and overused just like your mom.
- The syntax is long and ugly like your face.
- Shitty recursion support.
- No namespaces. What kind of shitty ass programming language wouldn't have namespaces?
- Many of its own modules aren't thread safe, leading to performance worse than South Park's rendition of Lorde.
- If you're going to try to understand a PHP license, you might as well get your Ph.D. in hieroglyphics.
- Most languages choose from one of the following naming conventions:
- getnumberoffiles
- get_number_of_files
- getNumberOfFiles
- PHP decided, fuck you, we'll use ALL THREE!
- Good luck finding an object-oriented framework other than Zend PHP Framework.
- No unicode support. No. Unicode. Support.
- PHP is as quick and easy as getting from Bronx to Queens during rush hour.